HTBAG: Listening

eyecontact.jpgI have ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) well atleast that’s what I'm calling it. I understand it is hard to sit there and listen to someone talk for more than 30 seconds without the mind drifting and thinking about other things. Personally with me, this is something I struggled with in the past. A girl would be talking to me about her childhood back in her country and after 30 or 40 seconds I started to think about a basketball game that was on later that night or thinking about something dumb like “I wonder which grows faster after being cut: hair or grass?” It is tough, but I have learned to control my mind and focus on the words she is saying. Believe me when I tell you, if she thinks you are not paying attention she will call you out on it and give you a pop quiz right on the spot. If you fail that quiz, you might as well just end the date right there because you my friend are toast. Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, but it will bother her and will take you even longer to gain her trust.
Eye contact is important. Don’t be looking up at the sky counting stars while she is telling you an emotional story. Do not play games on your cell phone or IPod while she is talking and please never, ever text while she is talking. That is rude and only says to her that you are not interested in what she is saying and would much rather talk to whoever you are texting. Look straight into her eyes and listen to the words she says . make comments every now and then so she knows you are listening and ofcourse do not look a other females. Lacey Chabert could be walking by, but you stay focused on the girl you are with. Many women can not seem to distinguish the difference between a glance, stare and a look, therefore do not even put yourself in the position to debate that with her. One thing to be careful is not to stare at her. Some girls may think you are creepy if you look at her for 3 hours straight! If you must look elsewhere look down, not at her body, but look at your hands or your shoes.  Whatever you do, make sure you have eye contact through most of the conversation.